


Ed and Ivy the mad scientists

by TheKeeper_of_TheSmut



Series: Momma Penguin's Family of Freaks [1]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Crack-ish, Family, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-12-02 09:28:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11506527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheKeeper_of_TheSmut/pseuds/TheKeeper_of_TheSmut
Summary: Edward and Ivy bond over their love of plants and mad science





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mrgoldsdearie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrgoldsdearie/gifts).



> Based off a conversation I had with mrgoldsdearie on tumblr

Oswald was sure that when he woke up today it was going to be a typical day for him.  
Step one: put on robe  
Step two: go downstairs  
Step three: stop Ed and Ivy from killing each other.  
Step four: is Freeze stuck in his refrigerator again?  
Step five: Is anything on fire.

The usual. So, when he did manage to trudge downstairs he was quite shocked to see a rather put upon Olga.

"Why aren't you making breakfast?"

Her response had been a mess of angry Russian and some heavily accented English spoken so quickly Oswald couldn't get anything other than Ed, Ivy, Lab, Kitchen. Well, that probably wasn't good. Perhaps they had managed to kill each other, which he sincerely hoped not given his fondness for the two of them. However, when he entered the kitchen all he saw were several tubes, plants that, 'should not be in the house Ivy', some beakers, and two figures hunched over the counter.

Liquids of various shades and smells were in several containers and while Oswald wasn't sure exactly what his two favorite people were talking about, he heard enough to know it was related to plants and science and it was far too early for this nonsense. Though he supposed it was an improvement over them killing each other.

"I think it would be easier to slip it into his morning tea. You know how stubborn Pengy can be."

"Yeah, I had to sedate him once to stop him from pulling his stitches. Terrible patient."

And on that note he decidedly did not want to know what they were talking about. Well he did, considering the new possibility of drugged tea, though he was reasonably sure they weren't trying to kill him. Intentionally. Nonetheless, it was too early, he was too tired, and quite frankly more than a bit disturbed, and so with nothing more than a passing glance he dismissed Olga for the day and headed straight back to bed.


	2. Plants make You loopy

Oswald had been enjoying a nice relaxing evening in front of his fireplace, a nice cup of tea (undrugged) setting on the coffee table, and dressed in one of Ed's sweaters, the robe they sometimes share, and some pajama bottoms. He's perfectly content, though he wishes Ed was with him.

Ed is in the shed turned lab, it's connected to the greenhouse, so Ivy is probably with him. He doesn't know what they are doing, and quite frankly he thinks it's better that way. But it's getting late and he needs to know if Ivy is staying over. He also would like to know if his boyfriend will be joining him in bed this evening, as Ed has a tendency to get wrapped up in his work.

One time it had been so bad Oswald had to literally drag a sleep deprived and hungry Ed away from his work. So finishing the last of his tea he goes to the kitchen to rinse the cup and set it in the dishwasher before making his way over to the side door that leads outside. He doesn't have his slippers on, but it's a warm summer night so trekking the garden path past the greenhouse to the lab isn't a problem.

One encounter with a particularly foul smelling experiment has taught him to knock before entering. He knocks and receives no answer other than a giggle. Odd, but then again Ivy does enjoy her plants. He opens the door and is promptly smacked in the face by a balloon that pops and spills a sticky florescent liquid all over him.

"None shall enter the fortress of science!" He takes a second to get the goo off his face and asses the situation. There's a slight haze in the air and Oswald promptly covers his nose and mouth with his robe. A sugary smell permeates the room and Ed and Ivy have piled boxes into a ramshackle fort in the middle of the room, their work bench behind it.

Ed is the one who assaulted him with the balloon, which Ivy found hilarious. They both have manic grins and their eyes seem slightly out of focus.

"Whoops," Ed giggles.

"We thought you were the snowman," Ivy supplies before bursting into giggles at her nickname for Freeze.

"I see, and what did he do to warrant this behavior?"

"He was asking all these questions Ozzie? Like about me, pretty sure he was checking me out too. And I don't know what Ivy wants."

"To be a menace."

"Mission accomplished," Oswald grumbles, setting both of them off on another laughing fit.

"Ed, you are aware that I asked him to do those check ups on you since you were recently unfrozen."

"Uh... I think you might have mentioned....HEY! My sweater. It's all gooey now."

"And whose fault is that?"

"Take it off."

"What! Ed, I have nothing on under it. Plus everything is gooey now thanks to you two."

"Well," and this time the grin that slides across Ed's face has a more suggestive tone to it. "You could take it _all_ off".

"EW!!!" Ivy shrieks and throws a balloon of goo at Ed who ducks clumsily crashing through their box defense. The balloon smacks into Oswald's chest knocking him off balance and out the door he'd left open. His ass collides with the hard pavement outside, a jolt of pain shooting through his bad leg.

"Ooooh, you're in trouble," Ed sing-songs at Ivy.

"Right, enough of this nonsense. VICTOR!" It takes all of a minute for Zsasz to appear around the corner followed by Fries and Bridget. Upon sighting Fries Ivy launches another volley of goo at him but it goes wide and splats on the ground near the roses.

"Yeah boss?"

"Get these two indoors and put them where they can't hurt themselves or others. I am going to shower."

"What about your clothes?"

"Ed made the mess, once he's sober he can clean it. If not, Bridget, burn them." And the little firebug gets entirely too excited about the idea of setting something on fire. Oswald watches as Victor lifts Ed up on tosses him over his shoulder while Bridget goes to deal with Ivy. Ed makes an indignant squaking noise at being man handled before settling and accepting his fate.

"Hey, boss?"

"Yes Victor?"

"Your boyfriend just patted my ass."

"EDWARD!" Ed is decidedly unashamed.

"Well, at least I can enjoy the view," Victor mutters pinching Ed's ass.

"Please, try to refrain yourself."

"Would you rather I groped you boss?"

"You're lucky I like you Victor."

"Sure thing boss."

 


End file.
